A Sad Few Days

The past 3 days have been the longest and most heartbreaking of my life.  Sunday evening my dad had a massive stroke and just about 30 hours later he passed away.  In retrospect his death was exactly how he would have wanted to go and in many ways how most of us would like to leave this world. He received excellent care at the Millinocket Hospital, through Life Flight on his trip to Portland and at Maine Medical Center.  Although we, as a family, had to make some hard choices during this time, we were always in agreement of how Dad would have wanted things.  He did not have to struggle with a long term illness, but was alive for long enough for all of us to get to say goodbye to him. 

It was a fascinating time at the hospital to see how each of our kids with their different personalities would handle this loss.  I figured that most of them wouldn't want to go in and see him since he wasn't responsive and attached to a lot of machines, but they all decided they wanted to say good bye in their own way.  Noah and James went in together (per their insistence).  I was hesitant about how it would go, but they are a pretty incredible pair.  Noah was more stoic standing with my mom at the bedside. James talked to Dad for a long time stroking his arm and, at one point, even climbed into bed with him.  James seemed to grasp the whole situation much more than the rest of the kids and kept saying, "Grandpa, I am going to miss you so much, you are my best friend." "Have fun in heaven and say Hi to Jesus for me."  He was also the least sad the next morning when I told him Grandpa had died saying, "Yes, but now his body isn't sick anymore and Jesus has fixed him". Ben and Audrey both went in to say good bye acting much older than I had ever expected. Audrey just sat for a while holding hands with him.  It was both a heartbreaking and heartwarming experience when seen through the perspective of the kids.

The upshot of having this happen in Portland was lots of family bonding time and catching up including with Uncle Russell. Gabe has the week off this week so he was able to take the kids to the bounce zone in Saco and keep them otherwise entertained.  Things were a bit out of sorts on the way home today, but we did get to stop for a nice picnic lunch in Auburn and enjoy the sunshine.  

My dad was a pretty incredible gentleman, a wonderful father and an amazing grandfather to our kids.  Most of all he was the best role model to all of us. He was able to express a lot to us not in words, but by his actions... He always showed up... for anything, he always made that a priority and made sure we knew that we were to show up for things too;) We will all miss him greatly in every facet of our lives, but we are all certainly who we are today in large part because of the example he has set for us.  We will love and miss you greatly Dad!